Saturday, May 3, 2014

Support me in my choice, I support you in yours

I am all for people wanting to work and having those options open to them. However, I do feel that we need to reflect on our lives and see what is important. Is working important to you? Do you find joy and accomplishment? Then do it. Go out there, work your dream and have peace. But what if your dream is to stay home and raise a family? What if your dream is to be a stay at home parent (mom or dad).

It seems to me that the current culture is where both parents have to work. That if one chooses to stay home, it is a horrible thing. People ask you, "Can't you find work?" They look down on you, as if you are less than a person who works outside of the home. I think this is horrible.

Granted, for the past year I have stressed out over my husband being out of work. But the reality was, I was stressed out because it meant I couldn't be home with the kids. I was jealous. I was mad. We were actually better off financially when he was home. We weren't shelling out $1400-1800 a month in daycare. It forced us to reduce our living expenses. We learned a great many things during this time.

So now that I have become a stay at home mom, I hear my "friends" whisper about how they feel I am doing the wrong thing. This is not the case. They have no right to judge what is right for my family, just like I have no right to judge what is right for theirs. They want to work. That is fine with me. I don't go telling them that they are doing their families a disservice. All I want to say is that my choice is the right one for me.

I will be going back to work when my youngest is in school. I will be teaching so that I can still be with the kids when they are off from school (for the most part). I don't hate work. I love work. But I want to be with my girls right now. It took a lot for me to have these girls and I want to enjoy them.

So for all of you hurting for me and my decision to become a stay at home mom (while attending school to get my Masters), I say stop. Don't worry about me. I will be fine. My family will be fine. This wasn't a choice made lightly. This is my dream. If you choose to not support me in my choice, than fair well. I support you in your choice.